


Treasure Island

by BigScaryDinos



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Enemies to Lovers, F/M, First Kiss, Internal Conflict, Light Angst, sudden ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-09
Updated: 2020-08-09
Packaged: 2021-03-05 23:01:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,850
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25793311
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BigScaryDinos/pseuds/BigScaryDinos
Summary: A re-imagining of the first touch scene from the Last Jedi.The prompt?  "Take the first touch and make it PG-13."Can do, captain!
Relationships: Rey & Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Kudos: 3





	Treasure Island

The girl was a rotten tooth inside his head, she was festering and infected; full of disease and decay and yet he always found his tongue finding her. The familiar wear of enamel was a comfort even knowing she was slowly wearing his mouth down. She would cause his ultimate failure and decline unless he found the strength to pluck her out by the root and rid himself of the pain he inflicted on himself by even acknowledging her presence. 

Today was not that day. Today was a day with the craving for comfort, a loneliness that was bone deep and far too close inside of him; lingering like a shadow in a corner. A human weakness that needed to be recognized and demanded the attention that would sate it. Hux has been as helpful as a blaster to a blind Ewok, and now, silent and alone he found the too familiar ache that raged against him but called to him in the strangest ways. 

A mutual ache. 

Rey felt the same in some ways and different in others. Unafraid of her own humanity, or anyone’s but with the same isolation that came from difference. She was an island that was uninhabitable, deadly to life and unable to support anyone or anything. _ She _ was deadly. 

Days like today she felt she couldn’t make up her own mind about herself. Either she was the worst thing to live, too stupid to grasp simple concepts or too dangerous to ever be safe. Either option leads her down the same path to the same ultimate conclusion. It was her. It was always her. She was destined to be alone one way or another. 

Much like her counterpart, such a distance away through galaxies and light years, she felt the loneliness. The need for reassurance and validity. She just wanted once for a single person or creature to tell her outright - _you are wanted. You are not a mistake. There is a purpose for you._

And yet she still sat beside the fire thinking of her life as a waste. All children tell themselves stories, fairy-tales to keep themselves from staying up with worries and regrets they don’t even know they have yet. She swallowed hard, she had come all this way hoping for some kind of answer. Any answer if she was being honest. Even just one to the millions of questions she found herself stacked against. And still nothing. No relief, no answers, no pointing in a right direction. Just this awful loneliness. It was an ache inside her skull where she imagined something important should be living instead. But there was nothing. Just confusion. 

She hadn’t even known she was speaking out loud until she looked up, her lashes fluttering when she noticed him sitting there, looking at her. It wasn’t a true sight, not eye to eye or even reality to reality. More so she could just see him inside her head normally. Today though, he seemed to really be there. Sitting across the fire with the red light playing off his face, reflecting his own forlorn gaze. 

“You’re not alone.” 

His voice was deep, and not entirely unkind. There was something about it that struck something inside her like the beating of a drum, the same familiar notes resonating inside her. Rey chewed her lip for a second, Kylo didn’t move. Didn’t seem to even blink.

“Neither are you.”

It felt  _ right .  _ The words rolling off her tongue in a mutual reassurance that yes, they were in so many ways so very much alone. The two of them were utterly and vastly alone but they were alone together. Together and not at all. A sickening kind of parallel line that never really meets but views each other from across a vast distance. Closer and closer but never really _ there. _

Kylo felt the warmth of the fire despite the previous chill he had noticed. Every detail of the girl stood out as clear as if she was right there with him, the way her sweat slicked hair stuck to the thin lines of her damp neck. The beads of preparation on her throat slipping further down her body. The way her fingers quaked against her knee. Her lips pursed to speak without words. 

This girl, this disgusting girl he reminded himself again and again. He should be creeping inside her skull, rattling it around and finding her weakness, her next steps. Yet he found his footing off kilter. She showed her weakest points easily, as if he was somebody to be trusted. He eyed the girl from across the fire, the light playing inside her eyes. 

“It isn’t too late.” 

It must be raining outside, they thought together.The words echoed between the two without coming to life. Rey could feel the rain inside the air, hear the thunder and the electricity of lightning dangerously closing in. Kylo felt it too, someplace in the tips of his fingers, the ends of his hair. It was nearly there, this mutual sensation. This push and pull. He felt he could say anything he wanted. Yes. No. Promises that he would come with her, name the place and he would fly to her. The sensation wasn’t really unwanted but it was alien all the same. 

He still wasn’t sure what would happen then. If she would die, or he would die, or nobody might have to die at all. If that wasn’t how things had to end. Instead he said nothing. There wasn’t anything left inside his lungs and she sighed, heavy and unsatisfied. 

In ways neither can even begin to fathom it still seems like it’s too late. Parts mixed and muddled and incomprehensible. A heartbeat passes, then another. 

She lifts her hand like an offering. Bare, exposed. The knuckles are worn and tanned, the cracks and creases deep. She is calloused in a way Kylo will never be, never even begin to feel. Her palm is lined down to the bone and somehow Kylo understands that he will always remember this. This moment and this snapshot in time, he seems to soak it into himself. The scent of static and smoke and sweat thickening his previously sterilized air. She’s too human. Too much and not at all and really he should be the one to play the mind games but seeing her skin coming up and approaching is all it takes of his eyes to flit around inside his skull. He can’t seem to focus, nor does he really want to. The scene expands; the familiar dirt floor, the crash of the water someplace close by. It feels surreal. It all feels like an unreality he isn’t ready for. He isn’t sure if she is either. 

She looks so sad, her arm reaching closer and closer. 

He tugs his own glove off, unaware he’s even doing it. She notes his pale skin; porcelain white, pale pink flecked throughout. He smells like leather and rust. The barren room is too white, the lights too bright and still he reaches out for her. 

They don’t need any words, not any more. Not once tentative trembling fingers connect and the roles and titles and preconceptions fall away. 

The sensation of skin against skin, bare and warm and real despite feeling so unreal was too much.

The girl. The girl. He always thought of her as _the girl,_ an internalized way of assuming she wasn’t his equal. Wasn’t anything but this body void of a name, dreams, ambitions. She was Rey. She was alive, her pulse thudded inside his throat as he felt her fingers around his wrist, clutching him there. 

As she sits before him and flickers in the firelight Ben flickers inside of him, his fingers clutching hers like a life preserver in a stormy sea. An entire ocean filled with wants, desires, loneliness and longing, all aching in different waves. 

They touch and his fingers find her pulse, thudding dangerously fast under her tanned skin inside her wrist. This is his evidence. His fingers travel up and find a muscled forearm. He discovered the anatomy of an enemy under his exploration. Wonders what would happen if he leaned forward, brushed his lips to hers. 

Inside Rey's mind the words scream and light like signs. I want. I need. She thinks. There is so much to want, she wants him. 

This new intrusion of feeling like she needs anyone, this gnawing ache of singularity being torn away to be replaced with a human touch. She feels his skin, cool under his clothing. His arms are thick and powerful. 

She leaned forward. 

“Ben.” 

It was all she could say as she felt him, the flesh of his wrist so much more alive than he betrayed inside his face. He felt alive, maybe for the first time. He seemed to flinch for a moment, a second passed, then another. It seemed wrong to touch him, yet she did. She wanted to. She needed to. More than breathing this connection was essential and it was all that was flowing between them. 

And he felt the same, his cool fingertips finding a home against her pulse. Higher and higher he climbed, he dared. He felt the heat inside the air betraying the sterile environment he seemed to live inside. He felt her; Rey. A real living thing, with so much heat inside her body bursting to get out. He felt the curve of flesh near her bicep, he leaned closer. Desperate to feel her against him.

She inched closer, feeling her body dangerous and tempted. She wanted him, god did she want him. She wanted every part of him because he understood. He knew exactly what she needed and there were no tricks. It was no lie. It was real. It wasn’t desire, it was desperation and it sank like a stone in the pit of her stomach to live forever. 

When lips met it was the accumulation of lives lived in solitude and loneliness. The peak of a climb that seemed never - ending. 

It was something so natural and real and raw, like the way a tree grows alone just to touch the sky for a moment. 

_ You matter. _

It flowed between the two in a moment, like the electricity in the sky. The way the waves crashed onto the sand. The marching of troopers down the hall. A natural pattern. Something so real and right. 

It was wrong. It didn’t matter. 

He touched her, and the names and identities were nothing. It didn’t matter who they were, who they wanted to be. It was the sensation of fingertips grazing the exposed chest, feeling another person touch her like a human and not some dangerous object. He wasn’t afraid. He was hungry and so was she. Her fingers clutched the hard muscles of his arm and pushed him further into the kiss. 

Beads of sweat dripped down her back, her face felt on fire. He felt it too, the heatwave inside his bloodstream. She was all he wanted in that second, in that moment when - 

“STOP!” 

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> I have never written anything Star Wars in my life and this is literally the first and probably only fic that was beta read.  
> I'm always open for requests.


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